Saturday, 21 July 2012

Searching for my Identity


I’m not too sure where I am right now.
I’m just standing here wondering what I want to do in life, and realise that there are so many obstacles that I have to surpass that I’m drowning in the weight of the pressure bearing down upon me. I knew this was going to happen at one point; that I would come across this brick wall and would have to face it with a determined face.
But right now I don’t feel as determined, I feel… Lazy. I don’t want to have to break down that wall to surpass it yet there is no other way. I have lost all reason to keep on fighting for my dreams and just want to curl up in bed and sleep all of my troubles away. It’s not that easy, because reality is a bitch that bites you in the ass.
Don’t get me wrong; it’s my fault that I have put myself in this position. It’s my fault that I stopped learning Chinese and losing that side of my heritage, mine that I have given up trying to do something creative everyday, and my fault for being half-assed to pay any attention to my appearance. I’m so lazy. I need to get back on my feet and onto the path that I want to conjure before me. I need to get in gear…
I need to start searching for my identity.


7 comments:

  1. Don't worry :) I hope you'll search your identity and feel better early ^^

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  2. I felt like that for a long time but now that I know what to do I'm very determined! Don't worry, you'll get through it :)

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  3. Darling I know what its like when you feel like you've lost yourself, Just hang in there love. You'll be okay<3

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  4. I've already felt the same!! Hey you know what if you still want to learn chinese then you can!! It's not too late!! =)
    http://amatwinkle.blogspot.com

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  5. Don't worry hun we all go through this phase at one point. Just because you are not sure what to do doesnt mean you should give up, you will find yourself at one point <3

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  6. I believe that everything will be alright in the end - always.
    Keep strong and stay on your feet, you can do it !
    I guess that's the question everyone's asking : What is my identity? What am I meant to do? You're not alone - we're all here for you!

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  7. It sure is a tough time, but this time will also help you to get closer to yourself! You will get to know yourself better, and when you have found your identity, the journey to it will have made you stronger! And remember that there IS always another way! Maybe you don't see it now, but when you are ready to go look for it, I'm sure you'll find it. Same goes for the reason. Dreams are important. You can go lie in your bed and wait for your troubles to go away, or you can go out and look for a reason to keep fighting. In times like the one your going through, it's important to know what your dreams are. You don't know or you don't have any? Go look for them! The world is so big and I'm sure you haven't seen everything yet. When you go out and live your life, dreams will fall upon your path, together with the reason. My personal reason is: I want to do it for myself. Because I know how much I want my dreams to come true, so I'm going to fight for ME, and no one else! Good luck with discovering your Identity! I'm sure you can do it! **bweeeh, such a long comment x3**

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Thanks for posting! I shall get back to you ASAP
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