Dear Internet – I Love You

My dear Internet,

Do you remember when we first met? I was so alone at home, wanting to go out with my friends but, alas, it was a school night so I was left with nothing to do. But then you came along and changed my life in so many ways… So I guess I could begin this letter by saying “thank you – I think you might have saved my life.”

Because you see, I never really fitted in at school. I loved my friends but sometimes I would rather be at home in my own company than to run through the parks with hayfever burning my eyes. But sometimes books weren’t enough and you filled that void. You, as cheesy as it sounds, completed me.

jfashion community in the uk, hyper japan fashion show
My first time at Hyper Japan!
international gaijin gyaru meet
Meeting gaijin gyaru from all over Europe

You showed me that friendship wasn’t confined to the area around me but can be found from all corners of the world. If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have found out about gyaru and other jfashion which has become such a huge part of my identity. This blog wouldn’t have existed without you and I can’t thank you enough for that.

And without gyaru I wouldn’t have grown closer to someone who has now become one of my best friends. Hell, I’d even admit that without you I probably wouldn’t have had the courage to ask for my now-husband’s number over MSN Messenger all of those years ago. Wouldn’t have had a clue on what to wear on a first date, nor what holidays to go on together, nor even on where to start when planning a wedding. So yeah, you could say that you were one of the first ‘people’ I went to when I was at loss on what to do.

chewiee and lizzie, st aymes

cute couple photo

wedding photo
Dear diary: Today I married the one I love

There have been times when I was so tired of you and wanted to escape for a few days. Like when you showed me how successful other people were and how much better they were at all of the things that I loved doing. Or when you made me realise that the world was a lot scarier than I thought. But it wasn’t your fault; you can’t control the way I feel about things… That is for me to work on.

And yet I always breathed a sigh of relief when I saw the WiFi icon on the corner of my screen. It was like coming home – you were always there waiting for me when I was ready. I didn’t know how to describe this feeling of “home” on the internet until I read an article Sara Tasker wrote where she described it as being a “webtrovert”. So, I am a webtrovert, it seems.

Me when the WiFi is down

I know that I am rambling and that you are probably tired of reading all of this, but I really don’t know what I’d do without you. I know, I know, “first world problems” and all of that, but I would’ve been a completely different person if it wasn’t for that moment where I logged in for the very first time. Who knew what my life would look like if I wasn’t a webtrovert!

But I don’t want to imagine a life without you. In fact, I’d very much like you to stick around for a very long time. Yes I know that I have been visiting you a lot less to try and get over my fear of not being good enough, but we’ve got a good thing going on.

So yeah, I guess this wasn’t really a love letter – I’ve only called you ‘dear’ once – but I feel so much better now that I was able to tell you how I really felt.

Until next time, my love.

Lizzie xx

P.S What are you thankful to the internet for?

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Lizzie is a gyaru blogger based in the land of Harry Potter and afternoon tea. You can find her either snacking or napping.

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